If Rhonda needed therapy as an adult, we were likely the cause. As one of the younger children, she was eager to fit in, to be part of our group. Of course, membership in such an illusive club required a fitting initiation.

In previous posts, we discussed Rhonda’s aversion to certain foods. Therefore, the initiation would involve food, and it would not be spaghetti with butter or a crustless grilled cheese sandwich. No. The initiation would involve mustard. Rhonda hated mustard.

I peeked into the living room. Mother was asleep on the couch. “Psst,” I said to Rhonda’s older sister Tami, “Get out the bread.”

While mother slept, Tami and I lathered slices of bread with mustard, laying them side-by-side across the kitchen table. It was not quite the whole loaf, mind you, but enough for a proper initiation. The rules were simple. Rhonda would start on one end of the table, and I would start on the other. If Rhonda could eat her way to the middle first, she would become a bonafide member of our little club.

Tami served as moderator. “Go,” she said.

I must give Rhonda credit. She tried, gasping as she choked down slices of mustard-ladened bread. She never made it past a couple of slices. To this day, I have not seen anyway who could match Rhonda’s uniquely green face as she rushed to the bathroom.

Mom was still asleep. She probably wondered why Rhonda was subject to strange stomach ailments. We never told her. Rhonda didn’t tell her either.

And that was enough. Rhonda was a member, having passed the all-important “how to keep a secret” test. She earned her spot at our table, and the mustard returned to the refrigerator.

I wonder if Rhonda ever learned to like mustard?

Peer pressure is a common theme in youth, frequently discussed, and often easy to spot in the lives of our children. But do we recognize the peer pressure that exists in adulthood? Could it be that adult peer pressure is easily missed within the context of a busy life? If we are honest, we also want to belong as adults. Living in isolation is lonely and unhealthy.

So, we partake in our own version of adult peer groups. These could be outings with friends or involvement in clubs, organizations, churches, or even our work environment. Finding your tribe is just as necessary for well-being as food and exercise. Such provides fabric and meaning to life. Still, there is a flip side to this equation that can be toxic. Just like an excess of mustard made Rhonda ill, the same is true with over-commitment and overindulgence. Listen to your body and spirit. When enjoyment fades to stress, it is time to draw the line.